Friday, May 27, 2011

You Tell Me: Introvert or Extrovert?

First, huge thanks to Carolyn Kaufman for guest blogging, and thanks to all of you who stopped by and asked questions! If you haven't checked back yet, Dr. Kaufman answered them in the comments.

The winner of the signed copy of The Writer's Guide to Psychology is:

LINDA GRAY
Congrats! Please email me with your address so we can send you the book!

Now I give you this:

Extroversion: "the state, act, or habit of being predominately concerned with and obtaining gratification from what is outside the self." Enjoying time spent with other people more than time spent alone. An extrovert fades when alone and is easily bored without other people around.

Introversion: "the state or tendency toward being predominately concerned with and interested in one's own mental life." Enjoying time spent alone over time spent with others. An introvert tends to fade when with other people and may become easily overstimulated with too many others around.

Now I ask you this:

Which are you? One or the other? Both? Somewhere in between? And: has social media (Facebook, blogging, Twitter, etc.) changed your interaction style? Has it enhanced it or enabled you to compensate for it somehow?

Next week I'll talk a bit about these personality traits, but first I'd love to hear what you have to say about yourselves! (and if you share, I'll tell you where I fall on this continuum next week)

OH, and if you're commenting through Blogger/gmail, unclick "keep me signed in" if it asks you to log in again. See if that works. Sorry, folks. I have no idea what Blogger's problem is lately!

38 comments:

  1. Hands down, an introvert. Otherwise known as a wallflower, shy, loner ... all that stuff. Parties are hard for me; crowds make me feel anxious.

    Social media has actually been a big help to me. It's easier for me and not as threatening. I don't stammer or stumble over my words, freeze up, or panic when I can type it. :D

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  2. I wanted to say extravert, but by your definitions, I'm either both or an extravert with introverted tendencies. Not sure which. My scale might be sliding. ;-P

    As for social media, I think they're made me more social (love interacting with people on the internet), since I still crave face to face interaction too.

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  3. I'm both. Growing up, I was an introvert. Now I slide more toward extrovertness (man, if I only could redo high school. Things would be sooo different). But I still need my alone time. I get worn out from beign an extrovert for too long. That's the beauty of social networking, though. Anyone can come off as an extrovert when they're not. :D

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  4. Introvert. For this and the Myers-Briggs thing. As far as social networking and blogging, it's easier for one main reason: I'm still alone. It's like I'm talking to a room of people, but I don't see who's there, so it's okay to continue. And that's kind of nice.

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  5. Introvert. Hands down. Social networking has made my personality easier because I am able to connect with people without "connecting" in person. Which works for me because I don't like being "around" people, but I like people. Which is hard to juggle. I can't wait until you talk about this in more detail!

    ~JD

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  6. Oh my favourite topic EVER! I'm an ambivert. And social media has DEFINITELY influenced my social interactions.

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  7. most definitely an introvert.
    crowds definitely overwhelm me, and for the most part i'd rather be working on creative things than hanging out with people.
    but in small groups of people i'm familiar with (like in the kitchen i work at) i'm often the silliest one who makes the others laugh. but that's actually a newer development. it used to be that i was always terrified around people. i was so worried about messing up and hurting someone's feelings on accident or not being able to communicate because of my stutter and block between my brain and mouth. but since i started creatively writing and blogging and commenting, i've learned how to express myself much better, and it's helped me out socially. which is kinda strange, i admit, but i'm happy for it. just the other day, marilyn- a gal from my kitchen- said, "remember back when we had to force any words out of vic? and now she..." "never shuts up!" i interject "man, you miss those days huh?" :P
    but it's really a weird thing, and i'm definitely still introverted.

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  8. 157% introverted. YES I KNOW THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.

    It's as your definition says: it's not that I don't like other people. I do, but too much of them is draining.

    I guess social media gives me a way to relate to other people without feeling drained. I can always back out when I need space, you know?

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  9. Definitely an introvert. I can entertain myself fairly well but while I'm good one-on-one or in a small group I tend to fade into the background during big gatherings. At a party (not that I've been to one in years!) I'm usually the one sticking to my group of tried and true friends. With social media I still tend to focus in on one person at a time for a conversation, I can't juggle too many people at once.
    - Sophia.

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  10. I'm most certainly a mixture of both. I tend to put on a good front. I've had people tell me that I'm strong and confident and that I carry myself well. But in all honestly, I often feel insecure and unsure of so many things. I'm definitely stronger than I used to be, not afraid to stand up for something I believe in. But I'm part peacemaker, too. Always try and do it with a smile and an understanding tone.

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  11. Ha! I was totally going to post about this in a couple weeks. ;)

    I'm definitely an introvert. I LOVE being inside my own head (good for writing, right?). BUT, my day job requires that I be more extroverted in interacting with people. It has its upsides and downsides, for sure, so I make sure to schedule in a lot of "me time" to refuel.

    I think my social media persona is more extroverted than I really am, LOL!

    Nice post!

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  12. I'm definitely an introvert, but I think my web presence says otherwise. I guess because i'm alone in my own world, I can let my alter ego out to play when I'm online. That doesn't mean I'm not the real me online. It is the real me, and I take pride in not hiding behind a cyber wall. What you read is what you get. But it's easy to let the extrovert show it's face when your physical face is staring at a screen.

    Day to day, I ADORE my alone time. I THRIVE in personal space. I could sit for 24 hours without a single interruption and be in bliss. But if I am in public, I don't let my need to be alone affect my social skills. So what does that make me? An in betweener?

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  13. Introvert, who has learned the art of extroversion and is able to maintain the state for short bursts of time (like a party.)

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  14. I'm an introvert. And after moving so much, I find I've pretty much kept my friendships online (that's sad! I need to get out more!). I wonder how different things would be if I didn't have social networking!!!

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  15. I used to be more shy and introverted, but now I'm finding I'm more social than I realize. I would say I'm a healthy balance of both, to be honest.

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  16. Introvert who fakes extrovert really well.

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  17. Can I be an introverted extrovert? I've always been a 'people person'- I enjoy the company of others and never had a problem making friends or being the life of the party. But I need,have,and very much value my alone time. Maybe its because I'm a cancer but I've always been a bit of a home-body and if I hadn't had friends who were like you described (needing interaction with others and growing easily bored alone) then I probably would have never left the house!

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  18. Hardcore introvert, but I'm oddly very gregarious online. Go figure!

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  19. I'm somewhere in the middle. With people I know, in comfortable situations, I'm fairly extroverted. If I don't know people well, or feel uncomfortable in the situation, I'll cling to the wall and watch.

    I was just thinking about social media not too long ago and it's funny to me. I'm exactly the opposite online as I am in real life right now. The people who actually know me are getting a lot less attention than the blogging/twitter friends who are writers. It's surprising.

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  20. Though I still highly value my alone time, I know I'm a social creature. I need interaction. I need friends. But YES Twitter and blogging does pretty well to fill this need for me. It's a great balance. Now if I could just figure out how to fit "real" life in there...

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  21. I'm definitely an introvert. I learned this while attending undergraduate psychology classes. :)

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  22. ditto what Dianne said - I'm a much more social in print :)

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  23. Thoroughly in the middle. I love being on my own but also love being around people I know well or have an interest in. Not afraid of crowds, just kind of tune them out.

    Hate talking on the phone but have no issues with "being loud" on social media.

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  24. I am such an introvert. Although sometimes I do feel the urge to be around people.

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  25. I force myself to be an extrovert.

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  26. I WON the copy of Carolyn Kaufman's book??? Wow, thank you, I am thrilled!! I will send you my address.

    Re: your question: introvert. I've actually taken the psychological test to specify type: I'm apparently an INTJ. (Was it you who posted the test online?) But somewhere there's extroverted tendencies. I actually love to be with people and to entertain at home, but then need LOTS of downtime solitude. And yes, social media is fantastic for introverts--we get to be social in our jammies with no makeup and hardly any worries about nerves.

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  27. I was born an introvert and I still am to this day. I like talking to people from time to time and hanging out with my friends, but mostly I just like to be alone. However, when I'm alone I'm almost always talking to someone online or through texts. So I'm not sure what that says...

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  28. MEGA introvert - a room full of strangers is sheer torture, and if I didn't get some alone time each day, I'd probably have a nervous breakdown. It usually takes me a long time before I consider someone a good friend, but once you're my friend, you're my friend forever.

    Social media - I'm pretty much the same way - twitter is incomprehensible to me and I'm a wallflower on Facebook. I'm quite active on one writing critique site's forums, but it took me a while to get that way, and probably only because it's a smallish protected community.

    That being said, I'm quite socially functional. I even worked a brief time as a communications rep - sheer torture, and I hate all phones with a passion to this day, but I was so good at it, I had a hard time getting them to let me move elsewhere. I even became the divorce specialist. Since then, I've worked as a programmer and as a CPA in accounting, where I'm happier. ^_^

    Laurie

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  29. I think I'm probably more an introvert, but I have no idea really. Is there something for confused people who have no idea what kind of personality they are LOL??

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  30. introvert. In Myers-Briggs, I'm also an INTJ.

    But Social media is great for letting people see who I am. It's a lot easier on Facebook and such, for reasons several other people have mentioned.
    Of course almost everyone here is introverted. Writing is an introvert thing. That and extroverts don't as spend much time sitting in front of the computer.
    Just the other day saw this interesting article "Ten myths about introverts."
    http://www.carlkingcreative.com/10-myths-about-introverts

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  31. Introvert (INTJ), but when I get comfortable with someone, I become very extroverted... mainly because I have an incredibly weird sense of humour which I normally keep under control so I don't shock/amaze/confuse/insult random people. So, it may take me a long time to warm up to people, but when I do, half the *conversation* is usually them gasping for breath 'cause they're laughing so hard at what just fell out of my mouth.

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  32. I'm not sure as I display tendancies of both. When I was younger definitely an introvert. I don't know if an element of 'sod it' has crept in as I have got older, but I'm definitely more ok with groups of people. Perhaps that just means I am more 'ok' with me? :)

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  33. Based on personal experience, I'd say 100% introvert. According to Myers Briggs I'm 100% introvert.

    My husband is about 80%/20% introvert/extrovert.

    My son is closer to 50/50.

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  34. ooo, tough questions, but I LOVE them. Are you doing research?

    I've always fallen somewhere in the middle, but I tend toward introversion. Too much "out" time starts to make me antsy after a while. But if I'm "in" too much, I get sad. :o|

    I think social media's made me more introverted. But has it? I mean, you have to be extroverted to actually engage, right?

    conundrum. ;p

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  35. Is there a quiz for this? Must be one on the web someplace... I like to entertain, but never have time. Perhaps I never find the time because I'm really an introvert?

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  36. Introvert, no question. I suppose one could say that social media nudged me towards extroversion, but a) it's a long way there, and b) it really only made relationships easier and more accessible. I'm still the same person I was without blogging. Yes, I have more and/or deeper relationships with social media than I would without it, but in real life I'm still very introverted. If that makes sense.

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  37. I'm an introvert; without time alone I lose my sense of self, feel overwhelmed, feel stressed, and slowly drop in overall functionality.

    That said, a year of street canvassing and doorknocking for Amnesty International really honed my extraverted side. I can act like an extrovert; it's just draining for me.

    I find it interesting to occasionally write extraverted characters, though. They always feel like the ones who are least like me. :-)

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  38. I'm somewhere in between but closer to the introvert side. I too find having to be outgoing (or on, as I call it) exhausting.

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